Dear Kids, Even though I fail…

Dear Kids,

As a mom, I fail often. I fail more often than I’d like to admit. I don’t think I make it through one single day without snapping about something I regret, but I love you with my whole heart. I hope you know that.

I hope that my love settles deep into your bones; and even though I don’t always get it right, I hope you know in your core that I would give up everything for you. I hope you know that I would take on the world for you. I hope you know that when I look in your eyes, I see my moon and my stars.

I hope you know that even though I get mad at you and I overreact about silly things, there’s nothing you could ever do to make me stop loving you. I hope you know that there’s not one millisecond where I have ever in my life stopped loving you.

I am yours forever.

I will always be your greatest fan, whether you’re captain of your football team or benched for the season, whether you have a 4.0 or a 1.0. I will love you and chase after your heart or whether you do everything right or you get most things wrong. Yes I’ll probably get mad; yes we’ll probably have emotional arguments where one or both of us has to apologize, but I’m yours, always and forever.

My love is messy and imperfect. I overreact when I’m scared. I miss the mark when I’m tired. I get mad when I’m overwhelmed. I’m impatient a lot of the time and for no particular reason.

Even though I fail, I hope and pray my love sticks to you like glue. I pray the words that come from my heart (and not from my exhaustion) are the ones that are written on the tablet of your soul.

I hope my mistakes teach you that you can make them too. I hope my imperfect love frees you to fail and to get back up again…over and over and over. I hope it teaches you to be humble and to say sorry when you’re wrong. I hope it teaches you to forgive yourself no matter what, because we all make mistakes. I hope it teaches you that life is messy, but love is always enough.

There’s nothing in the entirety of my life that I want more than to raise you as a person who has been well loved: a person who has been truly and deeply adored and cherished. I want to raise you as a person who is ready to take on the world with resilience, compassion, and confidence, because you know where it is you come from.

Even though I fail often, my love, I am yours until forever.

***

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