10 Qualities of a Really Good Friend:
1. They can be real. Fake is exhausting, and overrated. We’re all kind of a mess. Friendship is a whole lot better when you can be in the mess together. Authenticity breeds a beautiful level of depth and understanding to the relationship.
2. They are a safe place for you to be real. Dirty yoga pants, bad night, fight with the hubby, trouble with parenting, depressed, anxious, ate too many tacos and now you have heartburn…doesn’t matter what it is, you want friends you can be yourself around. If you can’t ever relax when you’re around them, they’re not your home.
3. They’ll make time. Everyone is busy, but if you want true friendship, you’ve gotta carve out the time consistently. Consistency is key here. It’s important you have friends who will do that whenever they get the chance, even if it’s squeezing in a ten minute phone conversation while they’re going through the car wash, or a text at some point in the day. If you never see or talk to them, it’s hard to know them. And if you never know them, it’s hard to build a relationship with them. In fact, it’s kind of impossible.
4. They like you for YOU. Listen and listen real good. If you have to impress, perform, or work hard to keep them around—stop it this second. If they don’t love you when you stop, then GET OUT. Ain’t no one got time for that. Your energy is better spent where it is valued.
5. You can trust them. You know your words stop with them and they have your back when you’re in the room, and when you walk away.
6. They’re approachable. It’s never fun to let a friend know they hurt your feelings, but it’s gotta happen sometimes. Friends who listen, really hear you, and can apologize are so precious.
7. They show up. Birthdays, bouts with anxiety, grief, good times, bad times, celebrations… friends who show up when it matters leave lasting impressions.
8. They aren’t super duper negative. There’s a difference between being honest about the ups and downs of life, and spewing a firehouse of negativity constantly. You should feel good around them the majority of the time.
9. They’re all-around good humans. Just like your mama said, you’ve gotta watch who gets your attention. If they’re nice to you, and then turn around and act like a jerk to the waitress—they’re not nice. Friends should make you want to be a better human, and they should see the value in others.
10. They pursue you right back. It’s essential to find friends who check in, invite you out, and text first. They initiate. They invest. They pursue. Relationships and bridges—neither of ‘em work if they only go one way.
Jess & Amy Weatherly
-Excerpt from I’ll Be There (But I’ll Be Wearing Sweatpants) if you love this you’ll love our nationally best selling book! https://amzn.to/3onCyyV